On Entertaining

I love to entertain. I don't know all the rules about forks and napkin folding, but I enjoy having friends over for a few laughs and plenty of delicious food. I often struggle, however, with my fondness for the formal and today's propensity for laid back dining and entertaining. As with all things, the key seems to be striking the right balance.
There are ways to maintain a structured dining experience without creating a stuffy atmosphere. Choice of menu can be quite homey, and served family style, but a set table with fine dishes and formal decor can strike a contrasting note. Nothing is more appealing than a simple beef stew served in a china bowl accompanied by a top tier red wine. On the other hand, very dainty food can be brought down from its lofty bone china rafters by serving with simple garnishes at a laid back potluck. My point is that the lines of formal home dining have become quite blurred. In these days of trendy cooking, many of the rules we once knew were flexible. The most important thing is to know your crowd; make your guests comfortable.
A gracious host will always, within reason, put the needs of his guests above his own. When you decide to throw a dinner party, make sure that there will be pleasant chemistry within the group. Accommodate your guests' diets and preferences. Incorporate their style with your own, allow them to bring something (wine, at least), and remember to have fun. Your friends will remember your company more than your menu, but that doesn't mean that the food doesn't matter.
Try something different from time to time. I'm the first one to bring out the classics for a holiday or Sunday supper, but why not throw the occasional curve ball?  A good example is making a batch of pizza dough and dividing up a number of toppings and letting everyone make their own pizza. Put a new twist on a family favorite, and don't be afraid of making something the night before. If you don't feel like making dessert, buy one, or skip it altogether and serve coffee after dinner. Ultimately, you can shape an experience for you and your guests that need not fit a traditional mold.
If you're afraid of making dinner, throw a cocktail party. Afraid of cocktails? Buy some appetizers and serve beer and wine. Just be yourself, give it your best shot, and the rest will take care of itself.